Sweet Candy

I met Candy in 1996 when she came to work at the Duke University Humanities Computing Facility, where I had been working since 1994. We were both at that department by the same connection: Rick Kunst knew my mom Taki and I got a job; Rick knew Candy’s mom Jing and Candy got a job.

I don’t think I quite realized then how fortunate I was to be able to observe Candy drawing and creating and working. I deeply appreciated and enjoyed visits to Candy and Jing’s house, where Candy would openly and generously show me her recent collages, paintings, poems, jewelry, photographs, newsletters. I continue to be in awe of Candy’s academic and artistic vision and talent, as well as her willingness to share her gifts with others.

There are some parallels between me and Candy. We both shared thoughts about why being of Asian descent is a special asset, but can also be an obstacle. We have both needed to help people learn how to pronounce our Asian names correctly. (Rong-Rong is not pronounced like the English words: “wrong wrong”. Satsuki is not pronounced like the motorcycle company: “SuZOOki”.) We both received a Tamagochi toy as a gift (remember those little electronic keychain egg creatures that needed feeding and loving?), and when I told her I was keeping mine in the original packaging, she joked that she also was never going to open hers. We both are lucky to have strong, independent mothers. Candy was special to me like a sister.

Candy, how fun it was to spend a New Year’s Eve with you and Lawrence and David (the pizza with pineapples and pinenuts was the best), to browse the bookstore together (we laughed and laughed and laughed about The Gas We Pass and Everyone Poops), to listen to music together (I really don’t look like Bjork!), and to exchange emails with you (you were so good about asking me about my dog, my work, my mom).

How I wish I had known you when you were younger. How I wish I had been better about keeping in closer touch with you. How I wish for you to be at peace, and safe.

I love you, sweet Candy.
Satsuki / Sunshine

DANTE’S PRAYER
Music and Lyrics Loreena McKennitt

When the dark wood fell before me
And all the paths were overgrown
When the priests of pride say there is no other way
I tilled the sorrows of stone
I did not believe because I could not see
Though you came to me in the night
When the dawn seemed forever lost
You showed me your love in the light of the stars
Cast your eyes on the ocean
Cast your soul to the sea
When the dark night seems endless
Please remember me
Then the mountain rose before me
By the deep well of desire
From the fountain of forgiveness
Beyond the ice and fire
Cast your eyes on the ocean
Cast your soul to the sea
When the dark night seems endless
Please remember me
Though we share this humble path, alone
How fragile is the heart
Oh give these clay feet wings to fly
To touch the face of the stars
Breathe life into this feeble heart
Lift this mortal veil of fear
Take these crumbled hopes, etched with tears
We’ll rise above these earthly cares
Cast your eyes on the ocean
Cast your soul to the sea
When the dark night seems endless
Please remember me
Please remember me